reflections and questions on life, love and paradox

 Introduction and Contents In Honour of the Birdwoman in us all, 1997 [1]   Where is she now, this Birdwoman?   She is here.  In every woman who has dared to be different dared to risk dared to stand alone.   In women who have dared to question ask ‘why?’ In women who have dared to dream dared to fly too high.   In those women who have fallen been broken burned   And in those whose gentle spirits could not survive the realities of this world.     She is here. [1]   Performed in Fallen Totems, 1997.  Installation and masks, Irene Kindness.

 Introduction and Contents BLESSING , 2006   May Earth ground and comfort you   May Wind give you wings   May Water nourish and refresh you   May Fire alert and protect you   and may your soul be at peace © A. Maie 2006

 Introduction and Contents AM I A REAL WOMAN? Feb?, 1997   Am I a real woman or a woman dressed up as a woman or a man dressed up as a woman or a woman dressed up as a man dressed up as a woman?   What is a real woman?   If I am a woman dressed up as a woman, does that mean I am a real woman? And if I am a man dressed up as a woman does that mean I am a man a woman or a man’s vision of who a woman is? Or if I were a woman dressed up as a man, does that mean I am a woman a man or a woman’s vision of who a man is?   What makes a woman...a man?   If woman equals shrill giggles, coy looks, high heels and tottering unstable walks, does that infer weakness, stupidity, flightiness? If man equals belly laughs, practical comfortable clothes, feet firmly planted on the ground does that infer strength, knowledge, focus?   So, if I am a man dressed up as a woman, am I using my strengths to explore her weaknesses as I see it? Or, if I a

Introduction and Contents Why Death? on the death of Liz’s dog. August, 1998 Why the experiment...              why life? So much time preparing to die Being ready for...but never ready... for death. To love is to lose              to be hurt                          to be left alone                                      to mourn To live is to fill in time between loving              to survive each day                          without despairing...                                      despairing loss                                      despairing loneliness When life gives no reason for be-ing the self creates its own meaning-fulness              What do I need to tell myself to survive another day                          what do I need to tell myself to enjoy each moment of living                                      to keep the pain away                                                  to forget...ignore...and find my own...                                                          

 Introduction and Contents TO LIVE IN MY BODY   2014   This year I want to learn to live in my body      not just my mind   Ridiculous      We all live in our bodies                  We can’t live anywhere else   We are bound by our skin      moved by our muscles                  supported by our bones                              fed by our blood and lungs                                          organized by our brains Of course we live in our bodies   But I’m not sure I have...not really A dancer all my life      ...but... I suspect I have not really lived in the body that gives me life I mean, consciously lived...in...me   I think I’ve always been somewhere else      striving for something else                  just around the corner...just out of reach I can almost taste it If only I could catch up      do whatever I have to do                  work harder...work longer...work faster                              work more

 Introduction and Contents THE OTHER August, 1996   The need for ‘the other’ Unable to define ourselves we need an ‘other’ that we are not   We are not like ‘them’ not female not black not poor not Jewish...Moslem...   ...So we are male white rich and Christian   This gives superior difference We are, therefore, better than   Then all that happens to ‘the other’ is...unfortunate perhaps deserved and...certainly not my concern ©  A. Maie, 1996